Waking Nightmare {FINISHED}

[nomacaa]

As they kissed, the world around them took another shift. It got brighter, a LOT brighter, but it didn't hurt Saxen's eyes. Their lips parted once again and he could see their breath floating up between their faces. There was snow drifting down to the ground. It was pretty, but he would've preferred to look at Helena than the scenery any day. He still took a quick look around, to see where she had brought them. There were lights all around, people skating, and even snowball fights and snowmen. He saw Helena follow a couple and he recognized them as her parents. He was about to say something, but she was hit in the back of the head by a snowball.

There was a short exchange between Helena and the boy that threw the snowball before a young girl broke in. He recognized the girl, almost immediately. Helena had been a cute kid and she was still a cute almost-adult. He wanted to laugh, thinking about how they had met. He saw a cute girl, so he went over to talk to her. Then, he heard Kato call her something: Mitts.

Saxen was about to ask about it, but Helena turned back toward him and gave him a pretty weak smile.

"It seems like I dream too much of home... I'll show you around, though. I still remember this place well."

He chuckled lightly and smiled up at her. "Show me around? What for? The way I see it, we've got plenty to do right here." He set her down onto her feet and took her hand, finally realizing that their attire had changed. He was wearing a black jacket and jeans, along with his normal boots, and she was wearing the same coat her mother had been wearing.

"Tu es nomanay," he repeated. This time, he translated for her. "You're beautiful, Helena." He paused for a moment, almost as if to let it sink in, before saying, "Would such a beautiful girl honor me by going skating with this lowly soldier?" He bowed slightly and smiled as he spoke. He was extremely happy, really. He hadn't been this happy in a long time. Memories tugged at his thoughts, again, but he pushed them away, knowing he could be happy with her, even if only while he dreamed.

[xthelonelypuppetx]

"Show me around? What for? The way I see it, we've got plenty to do right here," Saxen had replied, setting her down at last. Having been chilled a bit faster than usual, Helena found herself shivering slightly. She stuffed her hands in her pocket in order to keep them warm. The girl didn't remember ever being so susceptible to cold; as a child, she didn't ever want to come inside on a snow day. Now, only being outside in this kind of weather for more than a few minutes allowed the icy weather to get to her. Regardless of all of this, Helena continued to smile, even if only for Saxen.

He repeated those strange foreign words to her, then must have realized that she didn't understand and translated, "You're beautiful, Helena." A pause followed.

He called me beautiful...

With a pale blush, Helena averted her gaze and giggled girlishly. She didn't think she was, truly. There were a lot of things about her that made her unattractive to others. The tsundere was a cynic at heart, cold to those she didn't know, sharp-tongued and sarcastic, practically a jerk to anyone she didn't meet under the right circumstances. Though underneath all of the bad was a primarily nice person, hardly anyone knew that person. Few ever saw her regress back into who she was years ago, because she wasn't friends with many. Maybe Saxen was talking about the warmer Helena beneath all the ice. She knew that the colder one had far too many flaws and scars to be pretty in any way.

Saxen then continued, "Would such a beautiful girl honor me by going skating with this lowly soldier?" She would have loved to, but the thing was, she couldn't ice-skate. At all. Her eyes flitted up to meet his, and again the girl giggled, except this time far more awkwardly. As a child, she knew that she had sucked at ice-skating, so that was why she always dragged Kato along to wage snowball fights with. If only there was a convenient way to tell Saxen that she couldn't skate without looking like a total idiot...

And then she was pegged with another snowball.

"KATO! CAN YOU NOT AIM?!"

"Ahahahaha..."

"All right, that's it! Let me show you guys how it's done."

"HAHAHA, KATO! YOU'RE SO DEAD!"

Helena trotted over there, taking her younger self's side instinctively. The tanned boy before her trembled in fear, afraid that he was going to get bullied. Smiling playfully, the tsundere quickly chunked a snowball in his direction, almost missing. Kato's ice blue eyes flitted up to meet Helena's own rust-like eyes. He must have made some kind of connection between the younger and older girls, because he smiled just like he used to.

"All right, I guess I deserved that, but I'll win! I can guarantee that!" The two girls locked eyes and grinned devilishly, knowing that together, they'd be a great team.

After an exchange of many projectiles, Kato ended up covered in a blanket of snow. Giggling wildly, the two girls quickly exchanged high-fives before the younger Helena trotted over to Kato's aid. The older Helena turned back to Saxen, who had been waiting for a good five to ten minutes. She smiled sheepishly and returned to him. "Heh, sorry... It was Kato. I couldn't resist teaching him a lesson. He was my best friend, y'know...

"So, are we gonna go skating?"

Truthfully, she dreaded the words.

[nomacaa]

"He was my best friend, y'know..."

He couldn't help but wonder for a moment. . . was Kato her best friend like Gale had been his best friend?

"So, are we gonna go skating?"

Hearing that helped get his mind back on her. This was a time to be with her, not to doubt her. She had kissed him, for goodness sake. But. . . why was he doubting so much? Why was he letting jealousy into his thoughts? Besides, she had lost her world years ago. Anything she had there was gone. . . Thinking about the hurt that was involved in losing a world, he became very angry with himself. He couldn't believe he had just thought what he did. He sighed before he smiled at her and offered her his hand. "I'd love to."

Once she took his hand, he led her over to the edge of the lake. Without thinking, he stepped out onto the ice, suddenly on skates. He spun around to wait for her, then offered her his arm. She seemed extremely nervous. He smiled at her and said, "Trust me." It was simple enough, and the words, along with his character and relaxed demeanor, would, hopefully, have an effect.

Then, he remembered his question from earlier and started skating, slowly. It took him a moment to fully remember, though. "Hey, Helena, that kid back there. . . Kato, was it? He called you something. . . I think it was Mitts. I was wondering. . . where did that come from?"

[xthelonelypuppetx]

I wonder what that expression is supposed to be... Is he upset? What for? As Helena and Saxen made their way down to the lake, she couldn't help but notice that something was troubling him. She wanted to ask him about it, but the girl figured that he wouldn't have told her anyway. As they stepped on the ice, Helena realized that they were both already wearing skates. Clumsily, she followed Saxen onto the ice gracelessly. As she did, her mother and father whizzed by once more. Again, Helena wondered what was worrying Saxen so much.

Either way, he extended his arm out to her, smiling gently. Helena took his arm and held close to him, knowing that she would fall without support. Sticking to his side, the tsundere looked up at Saxen, wondering if he was reacting to her clumsy ice-skating skills negatively. Instead, he just whispered, "Trust me."

A single tear escaped from her eyes, and desperately, she tried her best to hide it.

Trust was so hard to come by for the tsundere. Her father was a jerk. Everyone she ever cared about was gone, leaving her in the blink of an eye. People had never cared about her after that, just like she had never cared for them upon being "reborn". A bond of trust was a little different than a bond of friendship. It signified a deeper connection between people. Trust was an unspoken, but understood promise that two people would never do something to hurt the other, at the least intentionally, and to keep one's secrets safe from everyone else. When something as fragile as that promise is shattered, nothing is ever the same again.

Having trust restored was a beautiful thing to witness.

"Hey, Helena, that kid back there... Kato, was it? He called you something... I think it was Mitts. I was wondering... where did that come from?" Saxen asked as they began to slowly skate across the ice. Holding tightly to him, Helena smiled lightheartedly at the fond memory of Kato. She had realized while looking back that her faithful friend had liked her. It made her feel bad knowing that his love was unrequited.

"Mitts? Kato made up that name for me because my last name is Mitsuko. Everyone said that he was my sidekick. We did everything together--whoah!"

In the next moment, Helena found herself on the ice. Again, her mother and father swung by, her father looking at her in particular.

He seemed amused.

[nomacaa]

She held onto his arm and kept close. That was what he had hoped for, really. He liked having someone that he could do something for, and, looking at her, he could tell that she wouldn't have been on her feet for long on the ice without him there. She held onto him tight, and Saxen smiled. Then, she explained where the name Mitts had come from, but was interrupted as she somehow lost her balance and pulled the two of them down onto the ice. Her parents passed by, again, and the look on Raiden's face bothered Saxen.

Instead of concerning himself with Raiden, however, Saxen kept his attention on the raven-haired girl that had just brought them both down onto the ice. He kissed her on the cheek and stood up, grabbing her by the shoulders and pulling her up with him. Then, he gave her a quick kiss on the lips and put his arm around her, holding her close. He started slowly skating forward, again, gently pulling her with him. “I love you, Helena. I wish this could last forever, falls and all. I never want to leave you.”

[xthelonelypuppetx]

After being pulled back up on her feet, Helena clung close to Saxen, letting him skate while she was dragged along behind him. Again, her parents passed by, this time at a faster speed. Her mother looked as radiant as ever, with cheeks reddened by the cold and a pretty smile beautifying her picturesque features. The girl's father was the nearest to Saxen and herself, watching Helena coldly. To think, they shared the same eyes, the same chilling features that made others feel small, insignificant, helpless.

Saxen kissed her softly, but in all honesty, the tsundere was still concerned. She knew, somehow, that her father in this dream was the personification of her darkness. That was the reason why he kept staring at her the way he did. He had to be planning to launch her back into the nightmare, to keep her bonded to him. Her darkness wanted control back. That was exactly why this memory came up... because he wanted to be part of it, to manipulate it.

And that's when Helena realized.

No one has any idea that my darkness talks to me. Nobody knows that my darkness is my greatest enemy... that I'M my greatest enemy. If Saxen were to find out, what would he think of me? Would he still love me the same way, or would he cast me out, just like everyone else? And here I thought that maybe, maybe this dream will change things. If my darkness gets the upperhand again, nothing will change. Everything will continue on like nothing ever happened. And Saxen... Saxen will probably never look at me the same way he does now ever again...

“I love you, Helena. I wish this could last forever, falls and all. I never want to leave you.”

You wouldn't love me if you really knew me. But one thing's sure...

"S-Saxen... I love you, too--"

There was a sound of thunder, and everyone turned to see that SCARECROW had assembled near the entrance of the cave in the center of the lake. On the shore, young Helena was slightly trembling, and oddly alone. Her father was the one who had held the gun. Lingering near him was his wife, Lily Mitsuko, who was focusing on a grain of sand instead of the scene unfolding before them. Men, women, and children froze, surprised that this was unfolding before them in public. These events usually happened at night since they were often ugly affairs. Everything was still, it seemed.

"We're very sorry, ladies and gentlemen, that we must enforce the law in front of you all today. You may want to take your children home, but please, allow this demonstration educate your young ones to better society instead of becoming a burden." The leader of SCARECROW placed the pistol back into its holster as he spoke. On his other side was a gaunt man with dark hair and lifeless brown eyes who went by the name of Vladimir. He was second-in-command. Helena hugged Saxen to her as close as possible.

This was the nightmare that actually happened.

[nomacaa]

Thunder. . . never good in a dream. Most people associated it with bad things, so, when it showed up, you could almost count on something bad going down. Saxen looked to see that he was right. Raiden was holding a gun to his daughter. His instinct was to run and try to do something, but Raiden spoke.

"We're very sorry, ladies and gentlemen, that we must enforce the law in front of you all today. You may want to take your children home, but please, allow this demonstration educate your young ones to better society instead of becoming a burden."

Saxen watched with a rising desire to act as Raiden put the pistol away. He was still about to step forward and do or say something, but Helena had attached herself to him. He sighed and decided that the best thing he could do was to hold her. He wrapped his arms around her and held her close to him. "Helena. . . I'm right here. Focus on that." He was worried and his voice betrayed it. That was one reason he didn't feel like a Second Class. He couldn't keep himself calm, but Shockjaw said that was why he'd make a good First Class. It was just another thing he didn't understand.

He ran his hand through her hair and watched the members of SCARECROW. If it were his world, he would have done anything he could to take them down, but it wasn't his world. All he could do was comfort this poor girl that had come from it. He looked back down at Helena and whispered, "You're in the arms of a Soldier Second Class who loves you. You're safe from everything. I promise." With that, he kissed her head and tightened his hold on her, slightly. "I promise."

[xthelonelypuppetx]

"But it happened... I can't escape it because it's my past..." The simple memory would haunt her forever. And now as she watched on her younger self, Helena realized that the fear in her eyes was evident. She looked frozen, rooted to the place she stood. Shocked. Absolutely apalled. The rosy red that had once colored her cheeks now gave way to pale fear. The young Helena's eyes were trained on her father's accomplice, Vladimir. In his arms... even now, the present Helena could not bring herself to even speak of this incident. No, she would never forget this day. Not in a million years.

Kato was there, a knife to his neck. Another accomplice of Raiden's his, Jackson, was holding back a rather heavyset man. His dark hair was disheveled, his lips blue from the cold. Helena had always remembered this man as greedy and impersonal. Everything was business to him. Even as he was standing in front of everyone, slipping on the ice fairly conspicuously, the facade he held with those he held business with stayed in place. It was strange, she had always thought, because she had always associated pudgy-faced men with Santa Claus. This man was far from jolly, however--he was a con-artist. It was this man who was Kato's uncle.

Her childhood friend had told her the story a few times. He used to have parents, parents that were good people, parents that deserved to live for a very long time. Their lives were brutally cut short due to a severe sickness that consumed both of them. His parents entrusted him to his father's brother, a man who was well-off and could teach Kato the trade well. However, his uncle was a rather unaffectionate man--understandable, though, becuse he conned people on a regular basis. He had never gotten caught except by Kato, and even then, Kato never told anyone but Helena herself. Still... here they were.

"This is Robert Luminaire and his nephew, Kato Luminaire. SCARECROW had received reports from vigilant citizens that Mr. Luminaire had been stealing the money of his customers through various means. With enough evidence, we had confirmed this much to be true. It was not our primary intention, however, to arrest the boy as well. We all know and remember how much his parents impacted our lives--such a kind couple they were--but, I digress. His uncle's poison has been passed onto their son. We, as the antibodies of this world, must be responsible and clense the disease." Her father ceased his speech to take Kato by the hair. Helena tensed up in Saxen's arms, on the verge of tears. She couldn't witness this again. It would kill her.

"Saxen, you gotta take me out of here, you got to make it disappear..." It was strange. She sounded just as helpless as she was the day this really happened.

Helpless... that's all you ever were and all you ever will be.[/color]

No! I can't be...

Face it, kid. You were never strong. That was just an illusion. Why else would you fall in love with both Hero and Saxen?

NO!

Pulled back suddenly, Helena found herself curled up in a bed at an inn, her pillow damp with tears and the feeling that her heart had been ripped straight from her chest.

It was just a dream and nothing more...