In a cataclysm known as the Nightfall, the worlds were almost completely destroyed by a harrowing surge of darkness.
In the shadows of the ensuing chaos a new group has taken shape. Led by an Aegyl named Kalos, the 11th Hour touts an esoteric knowledge of how to combat the darkness and restore the worlds. They might be the worlds’ best chance at survival; but nobody really knows enough about them to confirm or deny their claims.
On the brink of collapse, the universe holds its breath in anticipation. Of restoration? Of destruction? It is up to individuals like yourself to decide.
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There aren't enough praises in the world I'd like to give to wonderful coders for the Proboards community. The following have contributed to World Destiny in some way: W3 Schools for countless how-tos and countless of other souls who have helped get WD up to where it is.
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All Canon Characters belong to the Kingdom Hearts franchise, Square Enix and Disney.
It'd been a long time since her world was destroyed.
Merida walked through the streets of Radiant Garden, her posture far more upright than it had been in the previous weeks. She'd spent the last couple of months rooming with Rikku and Rapunzel - two energetic blonds and one free spirited redhead. The days had seemed longer when she'd just arrived; now they slipped by, and she was a touch worried about falling into an unwelcome monotony.
Still, the - taxi crystals, were they called? - had been up and running for a few weeks and Merida was itching to get away and explore some worlds. The idea of whole new worlds was still a new one to her - after all, she'd only experienced two. Rikku was being cautious, considering all Merida had were her arrows and they'd been... lacking, as of late, ever since the fight with the witch so long ago.
It was about midday - noon, she supposed. Early in the day, for her - the late riser - but not too early. The marketplace was buzzing, and though she wasn't on a mission to get groceries or whatnot, she supposed it wouldn't hinder her to get some more supplies as the day wore on. She was here, wasn't she? Might as well make the most of it.
Merida swiped an apple off of a vendor's stand and tossed a few pieces of munny back his way before he could protest. He merely caught it and laughed, used to the routine by now. She took a bite and waved at him, still on her merry walk.
What should she do today? She had her bow with her as well as her dwindling supply of arrows, so she supposed she could venture to the more uninhabited streets of the Garden and pick a fight with a few Heartless - but at the risk of losing more arrows. She could climb the ravines, but she'd done that already, a few days ago (not that she would mind doing it again).
With a sigh, she flopped herself down on the rim of one of those fountains that a few of the residents of Radiant Garden attached to one of the outer walls of their homes, a bit away from the hustle and bustle of the market. She finished munching on her apple and tossed the core carelessly away, pausing to roll up the sleeves of her dark blue shirt. Though it was winter, Radiant Garden stayed fairly temperate all throughout the seasons, and today was mild.
It took her a moment to realize that she wasn't alone on her perch. A sudden snore startled her, and she snapped her head around to see a figure sitting cross-legged on the fountain's rim. He looked strangely familiar... She scrutinized him, taking in the silver hair and the bespectacled face. He was obviously sleeping, and she grinned a little bit, inching closer. Who was he...?
"Oh!"
She let out the slightly loud sound as it hit her. This was the same guy she'd seen all that time ago, the first day she'd met Rapunzel! What was his name? Merida wracked her brains, attempting to remember. Had he even said his name, come to think of it? Well, if he had, she officially couldn't remember.
All the same, from the tilt of his frame, it looked like he was going to tumble backwards into the water if he kept on sleeping. That'd be pretty funny, but she reluctantly decided that it probably wasn't the best thing for her to do - wait for him to get an unmerciful dunking. She got to her feet and stood over him, wondering how to best wake him.
"... Hey!" she shouted eventually, figuring that could work. She added in a poke for his benefit. "Oi, wake oop, or ye'll get maighty wet in a mo'!"
Kuu's eyelids opened, his dark eyes registering the flaming blue ones looking back at him, set into a smooth, pale face brushed with light freckles and framed in a blazing corona of wild red hair. It wasn't difficult for him to sift through his memories to pick out this particular person from his past encounters. Her same haughty stance and defiant downturn on the corner of her lips were as recognisable as ever - her youthful challenge to what he felt was predominantly the male world at large. Somebody grew up with a lot of younger brothers.
'Now... it was you who I met that day on the streets, wasn't it?' he remarked, uncoiling himself from his meditative position to brush himself down while casually stifling a yawn. 'Well, you certainly seem chipper for someone who seems to have gotten out of bed only an hour or so ago, if that telltale damp in your hair is anything to go by. I see you're having an enjoyable afternoon.'
Rolling his shoulders backwards, he gave a slight wince as he felt them settle back into place. His morning exercises hadn't gone particularly well, as he was becoming increasingly more cautious of provoking the darkness which seemed to have rising with greater presence of late. His efforts at rearranging his mindspace through meditation was only half-working - partly because it was proving difficult to grasp on what was merely a surface level and partly because he kept falling asleep. It was proving to be quite calming in any case, which one supposed was beneficial to some degree.
However, it seemed that his repose was not to last so long today. Last time he had seen the red-haired girl, he had noted her obvious focus on her pride in her archery - he could see it from the way she held both the bow and herself and the great care she obviously took in treating it, even with its primitive design. If he recalled correctly, she had been with a companion, the vaguely inconclusive blonde, who didn't seem to be in sight.
'Well, it seems you're alone today,' he noted. 'I notice you're still carrying your bow around. I hope you haven't been having any trouble with Heartless since we last met - though I also observe you've yet to invest in any form of magic augments. I know I've said it before, but you'll have a much harder time with just an ordinary weapon.'
He eyed her carefully, wondering if he saw a sliver of fault in her piercing azure gaze. 'Does magic... unnerve you?'
His cool remark as he pulled himself - voluntarily, it seemed - from slumber took her aback, and she blinked - by way of flinching - when his eyes opened and flickered up to meet her own. (To be honest, he didn't have to look up far; it had come to Merida's attention that she was a bit on the shorter side among all these worldly companions - not counting the really very short people and creatures - though she'd been average height back home.)
She wasn't sure if she liked his cool gaze. It felt like he was analyzing her, reading her like a book. He resembled a scholar, of sorts; he sort of reminded her of her mum, but with less warmth.
"Aye," she said, eventually, in response to his whole anecdote of the morning. Yes, they'd met before, and yes, she was having a good morning. Her hair always looked like that, but she didn't say so; let him draw his own conclusions about the state of it. Heck, she hardly had any conclusions about "the state of" her fiery mop.
It was awkward, standing there while he continued to sit coolly, as though it didn't bother him one way or the other. After a moment's deliberation, Merida took a seat next to him, choosing to revoke the air of false dominance to one of more neutral ground. She straightened her legs so that her heels kept them propped up, and leaned back on her palms just slightly. She could almost hear her mum saying in her head with that disapproving scorn, "A lady doesnae slouch or spread her legs!"
As he continued to prattle on about magic - and she became increasingly aware of the fact that she'd voluntarily put herself into this uncomfortable social situation by waking him - Merida eyed him with thinly veiled suspicion, wondering if he was trying to poke at her defenses. He remarked in his prim and proper tones on the ineffectiveness of her bow again, and Merida felt herself bristling up in defense of her favored weapon, true though his words might be.
"No," she said stubbornly, and perhaps a bit too quickly, in answer to his question. She hesitated, and backtracked just a tiny bit: "Well, tha' is, Ah'm used tae it, now. Ah've ne'er used it before, maself."
She eyed him with near-aggression, as if daring him to call her weak for not dabbling in the realm of the occult. After her shoddy encounters with magic - first, turning her mum into a bear, and second, fighting with the incredibly magically skilled witch - she'd been wary to try it again. But there was no use making excuses to him; no doubt he'd see through them, and that she truthfully was a little bit scared of it - scared of, and powerfully intrigued by.
"... Why?" Merida asked, eventually, to the mysterious stranger that she wasn't sure if she liked yet. "Why d'ye ask? Yer a - ... Ye've used it before, Ah saw ye."
She'd been about to call him a witch. It wasn't for his sake that she didn't use the slightly derogatory term; she just wasn't sure if she'd be able to keep a clear head while speaking to him if he'd answered 'yes.'
Kuu’s eyes did not waver from her face even as she vehemently denied what she obviously took to be a serious and personal accusation of weakness. It was true that she was yet still a child, but it really did seem sometimes that the world was a magical place full of people waiting to be offended by something. That look that she was giving back at him weren’t just daggers, but practically killer lances with all the subtlety she was using to handle them. But then again, he supposed that it wasn’t his place to pry. He wondered what it was about this girl that made him want to correct her at every turn – she was not unintelligent, neither was she particularly arrogant, and if anything, he could read a sense of resentment at his mastery over magic (or was it at her own lack of mastery?), which was hardly a reason for him to be riled up. So what was the source of this odd discomfort at the back of his mind?
This is someone who wants to take on the world with just her bow, he pondered. She isn’t a fool, that’s for sure, so I would have to put it down to her age and lack of knowledge. But it doesn’t look like she’s willing to back down much either.
When she pitched a question to him in return, he took note of the glint in her eye when she spoke. She really didn’t like showing herself to be weak at all, he noticed – when pertaining to the strength of others, it was almost as if she spoke with a sense of reluctance or accusation, as if it was somehow immoral for her to be weaker. He turned his head to stare at the space just beyond his feet. He sensed that her attention and interest would hold only as long as her pride would allow – he would have to take care not to injure it further.
‘The worlds are a dangerous place,’ he replied carefully. ‘And they’re not getting any safer. It’s becoming… harder to make out the line between the time to be brave and the time to be afraid. One should learn to be afraid while they still can afford to… so that when the time comes to be brave, they will stand sure.’
Turning back to her, Kuu said, ‘You’re right, I have used magic before – on many occasions now. The truly amazing thing about magic is that unlike physical strength, which uses the body as the medium, the medium of magic – the mind – is potentially limitless. You can often learn a lot about someone by seeing how they use their magic. In the same way, you can find out much about yourself by watching your magic takes shape.’
Kuu hesitated for a moment, then reached into one of his belt pouches and retrieved a small, carved charm. ‘This is a Teine Charm,’ he said, holding it up between two fingers so she could see the red markings on it clearly. ‘It’s one of the four elemental charms that form a runic set. It takes your inherent magical energy and converts into fire magic. When you meditate using this charm, the magic in your veins will begin to awaken and respond to the charm’s call. By remembering the feeling of this “call”, you learn how to summon your magic at will. This means that the key to using this charm… is to listen.’
He held it out to her. ‘Do you want to learn magic?’
When he began to speak of bravery, she turned a sharper ear; she knew a bit about bravery, and it didn't just come in the form of shooting down the bad guys. From the sound of Ponytail's voice and the careful phrasing of his words, he seemed to understand such, too. She didn't quite know what he meant by 'a time to be afraid' - though she thought she might have a clue - but she didn't ask, either, as incredibly impatient she might seem. If her adventures had taught her anything, it was that there was a time to listen to other hearts besides your own.
It still felt like he was eking out a warning for her behalf, though. Merida arched an eyebrow at him, but still didn't speak - especially when the conversation turned to magic, a thing she knew little but had heard plenty about.
During this short anecdote, though, Merida felt her previous respectful impatience becoming her usual so help ma boab, ge' ON with it! She didn't much care about the "shapes" magic took that gave one insight into their "personality;" how do you use the blooming stuff? She'd long resigned the knowledge of the occult to the wiles of witches and wisps - but being in a new world taught her that the arcane can belong to anybody. So, why didn't it yet belong to her? Why was it still so unknown and... fearsome?
Her attention once again became rapt as he held up a charm that was declared to have magical potential - a charm that she hadn't quite caught the name of in her previous (silent) impatient dismissal of his monologue. She eyed it with a mixture of cautious fear and wonder; a remark expressing a desire to touch it got caught in her throat, and she didn't act on the impulse.
The key was to 'listen,' eh? Well, if her previous train of thought had meant anything, it was that 'listening' still wasn't exactly Merida's strongest suit.
But then he held it out to her with that enigmatic question, and her throat seemed to unstick. It no longer mattered that she wasn't a listener, though she was trying to be; all that mattered was the opportunity that he was placing before her, and it was all she could do to not swipe the charm from his fingers. Instead, she slowly stretched out a trembling hand - she! Merida! Learn magic! - and opened her palm to accept the gift.
Still, the offer was suspicious, especially with her latest encounters with magic. So, while she awaited the charm eagerly enough, she watched him piercingly, slightly afraid she was being duped again and it was her fault somehow (though, to be fair, the witch hadn't exactly duped her and she'd just been clumsy with her words). "... Aye," she said in response, eventually, but tailed on a slightly belligerent, "boot what's in i' fair ye?" on the end. But what's in it for you?
Nobody did anything for free. At least, she didn't think so.
Without an initial answer, Kuu merely gently placed the charm onto her waiting palm and closed her fingers over them - taking in the rough calloused sensation of practiced skill imprinted on her fingertips. It seemed her archery had been her companion for much of her life, but seeing how the callouses seemed to reach all about her palms, it would appear that she also had some history with a sword.
So here was a girl who had grown up pursuing strength for the last fifteen or so years (only discernible by her demeanour and youthful eyes, she otherwise struck him as one a few years older), now very clearly yearning for what she saw as a new path towards even more power. Put that way, it seemed like she was a power-hungry disaster waiting to happen, but he detected something more in her - she didn't seem to be seeking power because she was afraid or because of hatred, but rather because she was pursuing something beyond strength, something the size of which she didn't even comprehend herself.
So why did he hand her the first stepping stone into gaining even greater power, to someone so young and naive, when as she had said there was nothing for him to gain? What, indeed, was in it for him?
'You seem to have forgotten my name,' he remarked with slight amusement. 'My name's Kuu. Come, turn around and face me - cross your legs like this, in a very relaxed position. Keep your back straight - that's right - and place your right hand over your left, both palms facing upwards, with the charm on your right palm.'
He demonstrated the position, making sure that the red-haired archer's body was in exactly the right place. 'Now, the magic I specialise in is the art of magic weaving, where I focus more on the potential of magic through exploration of its forms, shapes and application and less on the power and strength of the actual magic component itself. So I'm what you might call a spellweaver. Come on, concentrate.'
He laced the last word with a hint of magic to draw attention to it. 'The process of casting magic is broadly made up of three parts. First, the summoning of the magic energy, which will be the fuel for all of your spells. Secondly is the definition of essence, where you decide upon the nature your magic will take. Finally is the execution, where you release the magic you have wrought in the form and manner you will it to take.
'The Teine Charm is a powerful object which allows you to bypass the first and second parts of the process to a limited degree,' he explained. 'While it summons the magic for you, it's very little, barely opening the door to your magic reserves. It defines the nature of the magic without you, but only of one such nature - that being fire. Don't try to execute it yet, you won't know how. Getting used to the new flow of magic within you is the first step of learning how to use magic. And as for what's in it for me,' he added, briefly opening one eye and a glimpse of a smile, 'Maybe we could start with you giving me your name.'
Kuu took a breath as he motioned to his student to begin. 'Remember, naturally. Allow it to unfold instead of prying it open.'
The charm felt mildly warm in her hand. She supposed it was from Ponytail's body heat, but she entertained the idea that it was the magic lying dormant within. She stared at her hand - her fingers closed over the treasure lying within - and suddenly was worried about any sudden movements.
He - Kuu - started speaking again. Ah, tha's his naime, is i'? She had forgotten, and now that he spoke it again, she remembered that he'd told them. She shrugged off her forgetfulness; she'd remember, now that he was having a bigger impact on her life. There was no point in remembering the little things.
Kuu followed his introduction with issuing orders. Merida resisted rolling her eyes - with far less effort than usual. Ever since her adventures with her mum as a bear, she was getting used to the idea that there were maybe things she didn't know, and things other people had to teach. It was still harmful to her pride, but she tried not to let it bother her as she semi-reluctantly obeyed his instructions. She corrected her slouch and watched him with firm eyes, making sure to hang onto his every word - this was magic they were talking about.
Concentrate, he said. She did - well, she tried. She squeezed her eyes shut, feeling the charm in the palm of her hand. What she was concentrating on, she didn't quite know; she let his words sink in, taking in far more of his instruction than she'd ever done in her mother's monotonous lessons - the only problem was, his instruction was harder to understand. It was all abstract hocus-pocus, like at the witch's cottage. At least she caught the name of the charm - Teine. Fire. She knew that word, and it comforted her.
"Oh!" Her eyes opened again as he asked for her name. She saw the humor on his face, and couldn't help but to offer a slightly rueful smile in return - though still laced with frustration, as she wasn't exactly sure what she was doing, and became more and more self-conscious, afraid of looking like a fool. "... Merida," she said, by way of response. The hesitation was a bit longer than usual; she'd become accustomed to not introducing herself as 'Princess,' because she hardly felt like a princess, anyways - especially nowadays. But to Kuu... it was a little different. He seemed to be able to just... see right through her in this weird, uncomfortably analytical way, sorta like her mum, and she was deliberately withholding information from him. She couldn't quite figure it out.
He resumed his instruction, and Merida squeezed her eyes shut again - though slowly allowed herself to relax as he told her not to "pry" the magic open. So she just sat there in silence - and her mind went to several different places, like her back and if it was still properly straight and she was still hungry despite that apple and wait what was she doing again?
Concentrate. She grit her teeth and tried to focus on nothing but the charm in her hand. She thought she felt it pulse beneath her fingers - or something grew warmer, anyways. She wrinkled her nose. "Uh... wha' am Ah s'posed tae be feelin', again?"
A horrible sinking feeling appeared in the pit of her stomach. What if she was just a failure? What if she just couldn't do magic? What if she just, for the life of her, couldn't do anything right but argue and wander and get into trouble...?
It rolled off the tongue in a rather pretty fashion, but there was a tinge of tension there which rebelled against the way it hung in the air. He vaguely entertained the idea that in the young archer's heavy accent, that name 'Merida' could very possibly be pronounced in the same way she uttered the word 'murder'. But enough of that, such a connection was unlikely... probably.
"Uh... wha' am Ah s'posed tae be feelin', again?"
Reverting his attention to the tense girl in front of him, his shoulders slumped slightly in exasperation as he watched Merida continued to adjust her position, her eyes shifting frequently under her tighly-shut eyelids. Her concentration seemed to be flying all over the place, and from the way she was clutching the charm, it was obvious where she was trying to hammer her focus into. Kuu resisted a smile. This was going to be a possibly marginally harder than he had initially anticipated, even for her.
He reached out when suddenly he felt a flicker in the air and suddenly a small, needle-thin spark lashed through the air at Kuu, who swiftly flicked out a hand to douse it before it reached him. Merida didn't seem to have noticed anything, but the silver-haired scholar's expression grew darker. It seemed that the instability in Merida's inner balance ran deeper than he had first thought, if it was harbouring antagonistic potential at such an early stage. But from the nature of the form the fire had taken just now seemed rather to reflect her fear of the magic in her hands - or perhaps not in her hands. Once again, that fear of being weak, of not being able to do what she felt she was entitled the freedom to do. Kuu closed his eyes, and reached out for the Teine Charm in Merida's hands.
'You're not supposed to focusing on the charm,' he said, carefully opening her fingers so that the charm lay on the flat of her palm instead of tightly in her fist. 'Relax your hands. Relax your whole body - but that doesn't mean slouch. No, hold yourself in a position of stillness. That doesn't mean you stay frozen in place, but rather that you understand the lack of necessity to move. Feel your body. Try to understand what's inside before you figure out what goes on beyond.'
'Don't expect fire,' he continued. 'Expect change. Try to trace what the charm is doing. It's not about the destination. It's about the journey. So don't look for the result, but map out the process going on right now, in your own body. The body's yours - feel it, know it.'
Kuu was right - she didn't notice the zing of magic that shot out at him when he neared her. Ironically enough, she was too busy concentrating on the charm, the source of the magic - or, doing what she thought was concentrating. If she gripped it really hard and thought about nothing else, surely that was the same thing, right?
When Kuu's cooler fingers touched her own, Merida flinched her hands away ever so slightly and opened her eyes. She adopted a sort of abashed look, her eyes off to one side and her teeth barely showing in a sort of embarrassed grimace. No doubt she'd messed up - even though she'd been doing what he said. Ugh. Even when she did as she was told, she didn't do it right!
He gently opened her fingers and she returned her gaze to him as he continued with his instructions. Splotchy red was showing in her freckled cheeks - embarrassment at her failure, resentment at having to be the learner, and dimming excitement at the thought of casting magic. She swallowed, trying to blot out those feelings; she'd grown up, hadn't she, during that adventure? She could stand to listen a wee bit more. She could calm down. She wasn't a failure, not as a princess, not as a daughter, not as a student, not as a person. She wasn't.
So Merida tentatively allowed her fingers to stay open, and instead of squeezing her eyes shut, slowly allowed them to slide closed. The silence this time was less excruciating; she was neither dancing around everywhere in her own brain, nor was she attempting to bore a hole into the charm with her mind. She sucked in a breath through her nose, and pretended like she was going to sleep.
She felt her toes, her nose, her cheeks, her knuckles, her kneecaps. She did as he asked - she concentrated on her body, not on the charm. After all, he was right - she knew her body, even if she didn't know the charm. The warmth faded from her cheeks as her breaths evened out - waiting for change instead of anticipating it.
As she concentrated on her stomach, she felt a strange warmth stir within that seemed to casually float upwards to her heart. Frowning a bit, she examined the feeling as it floated upwards farther and farther - up her throat, into her mouth and eyes and hair. Though she couldn't see herself, her skin started glowing again with the warmth of whatever it was; her hair was akin to a fiery sunrise as it stirred in the wind. Muted adrenaline spun through her veins - enlivening her, but not uncontrollably exciting her. Her heartbeat became obvious; it was like life was coursing through her - but not her usual definition of wild and untamed life... just the beauty of living and breathing with your body all in working order. She opened her eyes, and though they were blue, they quietly smoldered.
Merida took one look at her glowing skin and her eyes widened. "Ah'm doin' it!" she cried out in excitement, and immediately attempted to pin the feeling down, to hang onto it while simultaneously allowing it to be free. The magic rejected her; seconds after her joyous exclamation, the heat inside her rose and burst, and the charm in her hand burned red-hot.
"Ouch!" She tore her hand away; the charm dropped to the ground. A bright, shiny burn was visible on the palm of her hand - but that was nothing, nothing at all, not when she'd felt real magic. Her skin was still briefly glowing, and it was shiny and slicked with sweat from the heated moments.
She was undeterred; she rubbed her hand and eyed Kuu stubbornly with a glint of determination in her eye. "Ah did i'," she said with the air repetition. "Ah felt somethin', dinnae ye see i'?"
Kuu felt the magic before he saw it - a sprightly surge full of life and vitality, a magic bursting with enthusiasm and drastic energy. There was a strange stirring in Kuu as he realised (though perhaps even stranger, not with too much surprise) that at its core, Merida's magic was one that sought to do - it was a magic with ideas, with will. It did not like to sit still in stasis, but instead sought to be used, to be molded. It was simply that Merida had not given it the space or the time to manifest itself properly, as well as her own fear of the arcane making her own magic unwilling to come to the surface. But now it seemed that the door had peeked open, and it couldn't wait to show her what it could do.
Unexpectedly however, the fire did not manifest externally as Kuu had initially thought - considering Merida's personality and her tendency to strike out when threatened, he had thought that the fire magic would result in a protective flame or a proud plume. But instead, there was no flame to be seen, but instead seemed to pulse through her hair, her skin, her eyes - an internal manifestation, indicating a magic which did not mean to venture out into the open. Was it protective, suggesting that Merida did actually seek a way to keep herself from harm despite her bravado, or was it something more like a strange kind of loneliness, where the magic reflected Merida's deeply-concealed fear of being alone, where she needed to be with others, amongst the safety of friendly company?
How peculiar, thought the young scholar, That one who blindly seeks to be a great warrior should be in possession of a magic that shies away from destructiveness?
'That's right,' Kuu said half to himself, half in answer to Merida's exclamation. 'You seem to have made contact with your magic, congratulations. Now we do it again. This time, I will move you - relax and try to just allow your body to move as it always does. Don't force anything, or it'll end up just like now, except potentially worse than a few burnt fingertips.'
He motioned Merida to close her eyes once more, and once he checked she was focused on recapturing that state she had been moments before, he gently and inobstrusively guided her into a standing position, using his own magic to contain hers within the vessel of her body so that she would be disturbed as little as possible. He then placed two fingers upon her head, and spoke, half in thought and half in speech, 'Now, take up your bow. Feel it as you've always done. It's a part of you, there's no "bow" and "hand". There's no "arrow" and "quiver". There's just one "Merida".'
He stepped to the side, continuing to direct her. 'Draw the bow. Don't think "there's no arrow". Feel the arrow there, like you always have. This is a motion you've done countless times, it's like breathing. The bow, the string, the arrow - this is all part of your body, and magic is going through all of it. Feel it. Remember the feeling from before, and remember the feeling of firing your bow. Now, when you have both in your head clearly, feel the magic fill you and then -'
Kuu released his fingers from her forehead while simultaneously instructed, 'Fire.'
Obediently, eager to try again - despite the irritation of the burn on her palm - Merida resumed her meditating position, taking care to at least place the charm on the fountain's lip instead of leaving it unceremoniously on the ground. She slid her eyes closed, taking in another deep breath, reminiscent of before.
Her mind, however, encountered a brief struggle; instead of relaxing into the calm "waiting" stage, she was back to "anticipating," and impatience tugged at her internal energy. She frowned, attempting to banish the need - that wouldn't do at all. Just let it come, Kuu had said - and he had been right. Calm. Let it come.
Seconds after she relaxed her mind and her impatience, the lively warmth sprung forth in her body again, filling her all the way up to the roots of her hair and beyond. It was almost uncomfortable, the sheer intensity of the fiery heat, but at the same time, it was rejuvenating - the fire was like a little life inside of her, a separate heartbeat that glowed in her skin.
A nudge at the back of Merida's mind roused her slightly, and while she was aware that Kuu had said earlier that he was going to "move" her (which she'd regarded with some suspicion, though she was trusting him more and more), the sensation felt more like a quiet suggestion in the back of her mind - one she didn't mind following, for she was getting tired of sitting anyways. She opened her eyes - smoldering again, a pale, glowing blue - and rose, her whole body tingling with the magic. With her wild orange mane and her gleaming skin, she really looked like she was on fire - without the actual fire. It was a thrilling and beautiful sight, if she'd been able to see herself.
The command to 'take up her bow' was simple enough; she'd done it a million times, and the beloved weapon was merely just an extension of her own body at this point. The princess reached for it, pulling it over her hair and reaching back again to grab an arrow.
But, suddenly, Kuu's voice - all around her, in her ear and in her mind - told her not to draw an arrow. She hesitated, for a brief second, her mind starting to whir off task since it didn't feel right without an arrow - and the magic seethed inside her, ready to burn her skin if she lost focus now. So she merely drew another breath and focused, drawing the bow as she'd been asked.
The focus was as intense as it had ever been; to Merida, applying the magic in such a way that was natural to her seemed far more logical than sitting on a fountain's edge and just dwelling on it. Beads of sweat accumulated on her forehead in her concentration, adding to her already heated skin. Her mind offered up a simple flashback of a moment so similar to this one - an arrow she had not fired already in the center of the target, a moment of intense concentration despite the distractions around her, the clean slice of the arrow with another. That moment had been magical in itself, and this was much the same. There was no arrow feather between her fingers this time around - but it felt as though there was something there, something almost warmer than her burning skin. She didn't look, trusting her instincts. And she'd always been very good with her instincts.
There was a breath's pause, and when Kuu gave the word, the archer fired.
A bright, hot flash of red and gold streaked across her vision - a slice of what looked like sunset in the streamlined shape of an arrow. Merida hadn't been aiming for anything in particular - she'd eyed a poster on a wall quite a few feet away from them, away from any civilians - but her aim had been true, and the light streaked towards it, and in a blink of an eye, the poster had caught fire.
She gasped, and the fire bubbled up inside her, threatening to burn her skin again. She took a breath, calming herself, not taking her eyes off of the burning poster crumpling to ash, trying to let the magic run its course - ye've come this fair! - and sure enough, it did; steam rose off her body as she began to cool down, locks of hair sticking to her sweaty face. (She didn't even want to know the state of her armpits.)
"... Did ye see tha'?" she managed to choke out. A stupid question, since the flames were quite obvious, but she could hardly believe it herself; the fire seemed like an apparition - though it had nearly dissipated by now, crumbling the poster into ashes on its way out of the world. Though the threat of burning was gone, she still felt a tingle in the tips of her nose and fingers and toes and ears and even - so she swore - her hair. She wiped the sweat off her brow and turned to Kuu, grinning widely.
"Did ye see tha'?" Merida repeated, with a touch more fervid excitement. "Aie did tha', maind you!"
She couldn't hold it in; she let out an excited chortle and a little whoop of joy. She didn't care how unladylike her snorting was; she spun in the spot for a moment, holding her arms out. "Ah did tha'! Me!"
Even though she wasn't conjuring magic, she certainly looked like she was glowing again.
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{it's three in the morning and this is ridiculously long. oh well.}
As Kuu watched Merida, her radiant mane of bright, flaming curls framing her glowing features brightened further by that utterly effervescent smile, devoid of cynicism or hesitation, looking at him with eyes of glorious burning blue, he felt his breath catch in his throat as a word almost silently escaped through his lips in a bemused half-smile:
'Beautiful.'
How strange it was that in the heart of the wild and unrestrained blaze, one would find something so joyously elegant. More and more he felt that there was so much of Merida that even she herself did know, and his eyes flew to the future, seeing what she could become. She was far more than an ordinary lowly archer from another world. When her brusque skepticism and careless exterior was peeled away, when something like what he was seeing now began to shine through, he knew that there was more to Merida than what first met the eye.
But now the easy part was over - now he came the difficult part of unifying Merida with the use of her magic. He knew that now, when she was half-drunk on the ecstasy of tasting magic for the first time, she would be loath to return to the meditation. However, if she did not fully commit herself to her magic, especially when that magic itself was aching to do things, it would only serve to hurt her as it had just then. She would need to restrain her desire to impose her magic and instead work to make it completely her own - like how one often does not consciously 'wish' nor 'intend' to breathe, it would do Merida good to learn to give way to the flow of magic rather than her own personal whims as naturally as possible from the very beginning of the process.
'Well done,' he said. 'You're now ready to take your first step into forging your magic.'
He sat down back in his meditative position and motioned to her to do the same opposite him. 'Through the last two exercises, we've practised the three parts of the magic process. Your magic is of the internal type, utilising a medium as a conduit for its use - such as your bow. Archery comes very naturally to you, so try to hold onto that feeling. But now, what we have to do is to learn how to allow the magic to flow through your body naturally without causing you discomfort. And this is where the Teine Charm comes in again.'
With a twist of his fingers, Kuu summoned a light wind that lifted the charm from its place on the fountain and into his waiting hand. He placed it once more onto Merida's open palm. 'Now... be still,' he said. 'Think of a place where you feel safe. Think of somewhere you feel you can be yourself. Imagine you are there. Find where the feeling comes from. Hold it. Hold it until you don't notice it's in your hands. Then gently allow the magic to seep in. Don't try too hard, don't be tense. If it's too hard, don't force it but find another way around. Allow yourself to -'
Kuu paused, opening his eyes, only a hint of a worrisome frown upon his brow. 'Is there... anything you wish to tell me?'
Or is there something you want to know? What do you want to ask me?
Merida basked in the glow of a recently cast spell - spell! Even the word had an entirely new meaning to her now that she'd experienced the casting of it herself - and sighed, the last bit of steam rising off of her as the magic finished taking its course. She was glad that she wasn't wearing her usual thick dress today; though the wind had a slight wintry chill to it, she'd just recently been spending her time nearly on fire, and was still in the midst of cooling down. She wiped her damp brow one more time for good measure.
She grinned at Kuu and his congratulatory remark - a new grin of camaraderie that she had yet to share with him (until this moment, that is). "Forging her magic," eh? If that involved casting the spell again (she tingled a little bit at the thought of that much adrenaline) then by the Gods was she all for it!
But her grin turned into a good-natured grimace when Kuu resumed his calm meditative position and indicated she follow. She did, with much show of reluctance - though, privately, she was thinking how bad could that meditation be? She'd done it already, hadn't she? So she obediently resumed the position and allowed Kuu to drop the Teine Charm into her waiting palm - and watching with some envy as he had, moments before, simply twirled it off the ground with magic of his own.
Be still. Ha. Easy for him to say! He hadn't just experienced the fiery surge of new magic, he hadn't just cast his first spell for the very first time (as redundant as that thought was)! Still, Merida closed her eyes - though not before rolling them with good-natured sarcasm.
Think of a place where she was safe... Well, Rikku's place worked. She was pretty happy there, all things considered, despite living in somebody else's bedroom and how immediate her departure had been from her home. Wait. Maybe it didn't work, then. As much as Radiant Garden intrigued her and held her interest, it didn't feel like home - nor did a majority of it feel safe, not with so many things she didn't yet know. After all, Kuu'd said where she felt safe, not where she knew she was safe - which was quite a difference.
So she thought of her real homeland, of the dank, musty castle, of the oft-empty hallways, of her mum and da and three brothers and of all those expectations... Her throat soured, and she realized she'd stumbled upon yet another example of knowing she was safe, but never feeling quite at home.
And her mind went off to other times - of gallivanting through the forests on Angus, of shooting arrows into the sunset, of climbing the Crone's Tooth, of the beautiful danger that awaited her on every turn - and while her heart soared, she became the very opposite of the stillness Kuu desired, her blood restless thinking of the call of the wilderness. And she certainly didn't feel safe out there; in fact, she often challenged the dangers.
And thinking of her homeland brought a strange, empty ache to her heart. It had been so long... she briefly wondered if her family was all right, but the thought caused a lump to rise in her throat.
Her frustration, upset demeanor, and general off-task thoughts must had bubbled over into something that Kuu could sense - the bloody empath, or whatever he was - for he broke off his own sentence to inquire as to her well-being. Merida opened her eyes at him and sighed, a rueful and stressed sigh. "Ah cannae think o' a plaice."
To her intense embarrassment and horror, she felt her eyes begin to well with tears. Shocked and unwilling to succumb to weakness, Merida wiped her face with the back of her hand under the guise of wiping off the last dregs of sweat. She swallowed back the lump in her throat, her determination rising; what sort of state was this, now? She'd come so far! She couldn't give up now!
She grit her teeth and closed her eyes and tried to think of that happy place - but for the life of her she just couldn't think of one!
Kuu waited until her blue eyes met his own dark gaze, the previous azure fire now partially doused by the tears that welled up in them. As if he was reading a book in a foreign tongue, he held her gaze while he spoke, 'You miss your home world, and your friends and family. You're frustrated that after your initial success, you are making perceivedly little progress. You're unused to restraint and calm when your blood calls to act upon your desires. And with all of the above - these perceived feelings of yearning, insufficiency and ineptitude - you think that you are made weak. And this makes you angry, when a stranger you barely know reads you like this, at a stage when you feel you should be growing in strength.'
There was a slight pause while Kuu allowed both himself and Merida to digest this information. How much of Merida had he failed to see initially? For one who prided himself on his ability to read others, he seemed to have missed so much in terms of what Merida was hiding - the extent of the burden she placed on herself without even knowing it was there was one he had again not foreseen. And for one at such an age, when her life was making its turn into maturity, when who she was as a person was being defined, it was not good for her heart. But how to best guide her from here? He was instructing her in the art of magic, not being an adolescent counsellor.
'Do you know that anger is not an original emotion?' he began. 'Unlike feelings of happiness and contentment, anger does not spring up on its own. Rather we impose it upon ourselves in response to another emotion we feel, often sensations of hurt, pain, sadness, fear - feelings we want to protect ourselves from. When we are powerless, we are afraid of things that can hurt us, and so we become angry.'
Rising out of his meditative position, Kuu tentatively placed a hand gently on the young archer's shoulder, kneeling before her. 'We regain our power by first acknowledging our honest emotions. Magic is completion. Magic is wholeness. We cannot use magic to its full potential when we ourselves are so incomplete, with so many parts of ourselves left unresolved. Strength does not come from the disregard of weakness. Rather it is through our knowledge of it that we become stronger - we have to accept all parts of ourselves in order to use magic in its entirety. After all, how can we hope to be in unity with something new when we are so unwilling to embrace a part of us that has been with us from the very beginning?'
He offered her an encouraging smile. 'You don't need to fight all the time,' he told her. 'Especially when there is nothing to defeat, nothing to win. There's no shame in your tears. You'll go on to see many different things, meet many different people - among them, there will be those who can help you. Sometimes... even a stranger's hand can raise you to your feet. All it takes is some time... and a chance.'
Kuu tilted his head so that he could see her face better under her mop of red curls. 'So will you give me a chance to listen?'
Merida met Kuu's gaze with a certain defiance, despite the emotions bubbling up inside her. She felt like a storm was raging inside of her - a storm brought on by Kuu's opposing personality, by the newly awakened magic, and by the fact that she was finally facing what was bothering her.
It wasn't fair, she decided, that Kuu could tell this much about her. How long had they known each other? Barely an hour, if you didn't count their singular meeting all those months ago. And yet he was reading her like a book (and she'd never been overly fond of books in the first place). When he finished his first anecdote, she dug her fingers into the fabric of her pants, swallowing a large lump that had arrived in her throat and fighting the burning in the pit of her stomach. It wasn't FAIR! He could tell she was upset and she was angry but he was making her angry because he could tell and then it just kept spinning in circles forever and ever -
He continued to speak, bringing himself closer to her on his knees and placing a gentle hand on her shoulder. She didn't move her gaze from his, her lower lip sticking out defiantly as she pushed back the sudden onslaught of tears. He talked on and on about magic in those abstract terms that were just starting to make sense to the fiery archer and as long as they stayed in the technical stuff maybe she'd be all right -
You don't need to fight all the time.
Oh. Well. That was hitting the nail on the head. She glared at him; what gave him the right to be so bleedin' understanding? She was ready for a fight - she'd braced herself for one - so somebody taking the time to tell her "it's okay, it's all okay" was a huge change and it was bewildering and a tad upsetting to her. Unable to react in the usual defiant way she was prone to, she stayed silent as he said all the right - and therefore wrong - things. She wasn't used to being understood. How dare he? How dare he...?
A tear leaked out from the side of her eye, and she sniffled - but she didn't back down. She wasn't fighting, but she wasn't going to give up. Instead of telling the tears to stay back, she swallowed and sighed and rubbed her eyes with the back of her hand. She didn't want to break down - not now, not when they were so close. She simply nodded to acknowledge his desire to help her - though she wasn't brushing him off by any means. She just didn't trust herself to speak, not now, not when a gross crying session could be close behind. And, to be honest, she wasn't used to opening up to people - she was far too used to rejection and deaf ears. So she simply resumed her meditative position, her eyes fluttering shut - a few stray tears continuing to wind down her face - and took in a deep, calming breath.
Ah can do this. She took in another deep breath and went back to his previous instruction - think of a place where she felt safe. She thought of the stables, of brushing and feeding Angus, of speaking to her horse about her problems when no one else would listen. The memories brought a lump to her throat, but - taking Kuu's advice - instead of fighting it, she allowed the tears of sadness to streak down her face, gentle and calming. The storm inside her was subsiding, simply because she was allowing it to run its course.
"All raigh'," she said softly, once her heartbeat had slowed, lost in the wash of bittersweet memories. "Wha's next?"