[Original] Flint Adler [A]

[Doogie]

ORIGINAL or CANON:
Original

What was the inspiration for them / do they embody a particular feeling or emotion?
Doogie has become the embodiment of the desire to protect others.

Name:
Flint Adler

Nickname:
Doogie

Age:
30

Gender:
Male

Species:
Human

Being Type:
Somebody

Position:
Good

Appearance:
Towering at 6’2, Doogie is pretty easy to find out in a crowd purely because of his height. It’s made easier by his hair, with the dark brown sides cut pretty short, while the light blue colored top is swept back. His eyes are a magenta color, deep as wells revealing the breadth of knowledge found within him. His right ear has a small black piercing in the lobe, a trinket he picked up years ago during his search for his friend Shun that he couldn’t ever bring to abandon.

His lean, muscular build is accented by a tight fitting blue and green plaid shirt, sleeves rolled up just past his elbows, and a fitted black vest. Doogie’s found that as he’s aged, he’s come to appreciate clothes that others might call “formal”, he just calls them “fashionable”. He accompanies said fashionable clothes with tight, dark wash blue jeans and black sneakers with a white rim around the bottom.

History:
Doogie was born on Lunus, a planet already infested with Heartless. His parents had always told him that they had first come about 15 years before he was born, but that not much had changed other than the occasional danger, and more importantly, Gummi Blocks. As soon as they were discovered, people started testing them to see what they could be used for. It wasn’t but a few months before scientists discovered their ability to be used together to form a ship capable of not only flight, but otherworldly flight!

Doogie’s parents took advantage of all the Gummi Blocks they could find so they could use them to achieve their dream of travelling around their world and seeing other sights as well. Years later they had their one and only child, Flint. They took him on their trips everywhere they went, and he loved it. Then, at the age of 10, while he and his parents were travelling, they happened upon a merchant trying to sell them a “magic notebook”, and even though they thought it was silly and there was no way it was magical, Doogie convinced them to buy it. Upon inspection back in the ship, he discovered that it actually was magic because he was able to bring his drawings to life!

As he travelled with his parents, Doogie made some friends and began trying to draw them. Soon he discovered that if he was close enough to his friend that they could help him out in a pinch or just talk to him to keep him company. Unfortunately, there was nobody that could help him out when he was separated from his parents.

He had never flown the Gummi Ship his parents had, but at the age of 15 his parents decided that it was about time he began learning. They agreed that he was old enough now and wanted to give him the chance to fly the Gummi Ship out into space on his own. Unfortunately, it was incredibly well timed as that was the moment that the Heartless finally found that world’s heart, and the entire world was destroyed. It took Doogie by surprise and he lost control of the Gummi Ship and was knocked unconscious only to be awoken after the crash of his Gummi Ship into Traverse Town. From there, he spent some time trying to repair his ship and discovered a friend that would change his life forever.

Ricardus Dar’Nala, otherwise known as Shun, had been one of the first people Doogie talked to after finally finishing up the repairs on his Gummi Ship. They quickly became friends, travelling around Traverse Town trying to discover the “Heart” of the world that Doogie had heard about, and were soon joined by a boy by the name of Tyson. They searched around town and found the Bell above the Gizmo Shop and hit it. Unfortunately, nothing happened as Sora had long since sealed the Keyhole. Doogie and Shun decided that they’d stick together and became travelling buddies, leaving Traverse Town together and going in search of other worlds.

They soon happened upon a spooky world that Doogie later learned was named “Halloween Town”. When they reached the surface, they were shocked to see that their appearances had changed! Doogie seemed to have the rotting skin of a zombie while Shun had the pale skin of a vampire. Once they got over their new appearances, they began exploring the world. Hoping they’d find this so called “Heart” that they had searched for in Traverse Town, finally finding it near Oogie Boogie’s ruined manor. Soon, after they were attacked by a Possessor Heartless and after a long battle they defeated it, but unfortunately Shun suffered massive injuries causing him to fall unconscious.

Doogie took him back to the Gummi Ship, and after nursing him back to consciousness they shared a moment of tenderness where they revealed their feelings for one another, but unfortunately it was short lived. Doogie flew the ship to Traverse Town to try and find a healer, but while he was away something happened to Shun and he disappeared. Doogie spent years searching for him, but was never able to find him. Eventually he gave up, hoping that his friend had found safety and was able to heal and find whatever it was that he was looking for.

For the next 5 years Doogie searched the worlds alone, trying to discover as much as he could about them. He met a couple friends along the way, but didn’t ever stick around with them very long. He was scared that if he travelled along with them for too long that they’d up and disappear like Shun did. What Doogie mostly did though, was work on his sword fighting skills, determined that if he met another person that needed his help, he’d be able to defend them and make sure that they didn’t get hurt like Shun had. He ended up settling down in Twilight Town, making a home and assisting people that came through.

He had recently been thinking of taking another adventure because he felt like he was becoming complacent, but he began noticing that some of the stars were starting to go out one by one. Not only that, but more and more people were suddenly appearing in Twilight Town. It seemed as if worlds were disappearing and Twilight Town itself was falling apart. Doogie certainly felt like he’d be needed in the near future, if not just to defend the new kids appearing but to also help reassemble the world.

Current Primary Objective:
Discover what has marred Twilight Town and bring together a band of people to fight against it

Learning type:
Kinesthetic learner

Personality:
Doogie is incredibly friendly and trusting, willing to give everyone multiple chances; but while on the surface he is friendly to just about everyone he meets, it takes a while before Doogie would consider someone his true friend. He’s learned over the years what it means to lose someone, and how much of a toll it can take on a person to go through that; having experienced this first hand he’s reluctant to grow incredibly close to just anyone he meets. Even with that being the case, anybody that Doogie considers a friend is fiercely protected. He values other people’s lives high above his own and recognizes that sometimes you have to give up your own life to protect others and serve the greater good. His biggest fear would be knowing that something happened to one of his friends because he wasn’t strong enough to protect them.

Doogie has seen much of the world and has experienced first hand what it’s like to be a young adventuring teen with no parents and no real connections to any of the worlds he explored. Now that he’s older, Doogie really feels a sense of obligation to all of the new fresh faced kids around, all just trying to get through the day.

Home World:
Lunus

Natural Affinities/Abilities/Skills:
Animation;;
Doogie is able to “animate” his notebook. A special talent that he developed while on his home world. Whatever he draws he is able to make come to life. The notebook will disappear in a flash of light, and will become the thing he draws. At the moment Doogie only has 4 drawings. These drawings have taken countless hours to perfect, and a new one simply cannot be added quickly. Doogie must develop a relationship (whether it be a friendship or whatever) and then, (after getting permission from the RP’er) Doogie is able to practice his drawings of the person. This will often take several days to perfect the drawing. All drawings are complete in his book, and only need to be “animated” for them to be summoned.

His drawings:

Drakkar the Dragon (WITHERED)

Weapons;;

Claws, teeth, tail.

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Abilities;;

Elemental Breath - ((Drakkar breathes out a "beam" of an element, all the elements he can use as of right now are listed below. Cooldown of 2 posts))

Fire Breath

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Limit;;

Ultimate Breath - Drakkar summons all the different Elemental Breaths he knows, and breathes them at the same time, unleashing a powerful attack. ((If he uses this ability, he will be incredibly weak and sluggish, unable to dodge most incoming attacks although not quite unconscious. Any other abilities used will take him one step closer to unconsciousness. Useable once per summon.))

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K’rayon the Cleric

Weapons;;

Staff

------

Abilities;;

Cure ((Has no offensive abilities.))

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Limit;;

Heaven's Light

For this Limit, K’rayon can either A) Heal one character completely, even if they are about to die, or B) Heal multiple people, but on just a regular Cure level. ((Once he uses this, he physically passes out, and unless Doogie ends the summoning early, he can still be attacked))

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Lysander the Swordsman (WITHERED)

Weapons;;

Sword

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Abilities;;

Sword fighting - Lysander is very good at sword fighting, having done it a few decades.

Blitz - This is a wide area attack where Lysander spins around with his sword extended, attacking a wide area of people. Not an extremely strong attack.

------

Limit;;

Final Strike

For this, Lysander puts his heart and soul into the blade, pouring his energy in it. This allows his attacks to be very powerful, and quite often this can end the fight. Unfortunately, this attack takes out all of his energy, and after a few attacks (1 post) he is "killed". ((Immediately after using this, he disappears in a flash of light. His page in Doogie’s sketchbook becomes withered and is incredibly difficult to be repaired. Double repair time if withering is caused by this.))

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Ricardus Dar’Nala aka Shun (Added with permission from RP’er)

Weapons;;

Dagger

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Abilities;;

Reflect

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Limit;;

True Friendship

Shun is able to bond with Doogie, boosting his abilities and slightly healing him, removing shallow cuts and bruises ((Useable once per thread. Not incredibly powerful because the lack of contact between them over the years))

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NOTE: Doogie's drawings can only be "summoned" for four posts, once per thread. If they stay out for any longer, then they begin to fade. If they fade completely (2 extra posts), then their page withers, becoming unusable until it is repaired. This is extremely hard, and will take several days of dedicated repair (I might create a thread just for this purpose, we’ll see). Doogie is also able to add drawings to his notebook, such as new friends he meets during his journey, only to be added with permission of the RP'er.

Sword Fighting;;
Not by any means the most talented swordsman in all existence, Doogie gave up his spell casting years ago in order to hone his craft and become a formidable opponent over the years.

Self Sacrifice;;
Doogie discovered a few years ago that if his will was strong enough he could “protect” others from harm at the cost of injury to himself. He can “cast” this on an ally in battle and they will take half damage, causing Doogie to take full damage in their place. Once per thread, Doogie can completely negate the damage an ally would take from an attack, causing Doogie to take double the damage they would have taken.
(IE: Ally would take 100 dmg, reduced to 50. Doogie takes 100 dmg. OR Ally would take 100 dmg, reduced to 0. Doogie takes 200 dmg)
((This ability can be cast multiple times a thread at it’s lower level, but extra damage must be taken into account. The full negate can only happen once per thread and is devastating to Doogie’s health.))


Limitations/Drawbacks:

• Doogie is an incredibly protective person, willing to give up his own life for a friend’s. This often leads to situations where he ends up a lot with a lot more injuries than necessary.
• His Drawings’ powers are based on how strong his relationship is/was with the friend they were based on. If he hasn’t seen that friend in a while or didn’t have an incredibly strong bond with them, their abilities might weaken or regress to a weaker state.
• Doogie’s Self Sacrifice ability causes him incredible harm, and as such it has to be very sparingly used or else he’ll quickly take more damage than anticipated and he’ll become incapacitated.
• If Doogie had been using his Self Sacrifice ability and is knocked unconscious, it automatically ends, causing his ally to take normal damage.
• Having abandoned his magic years ago, he’ll find it difficult to pick up basic spells should he try learning them again.

Passive:

Heartborn Husk

Weapon:
Doogie has two “weapons” if you will. He has his trusty sword which he has begun using more and more recently, and his Notebook. His notebook is a simple book, bound in black leather, with white pages in the middle. The front has a simple white sketch of a heart in the center and Doogie’s name sloppily written on the top.
His sword is a simple long-sword that he gained years ago on his adventure. His old sword had become a bit small, but while he was adventuring in Traverse Town he had found this new one. It has a simple leather wrapped handle with no jewel inlaid in the guard or pommel.

Role Playing Sample:
Doogie looked around, his heartbeat pounding in his ears accented by the sounds of his feet striking the ground. Can’t stop…must keep running! he thought as he stared ahead, reaching forward, trying to catch the hand of his friend. His legs began to slow and feel as if they were filled with cement. N-No! I can’t stop now! I almost made it to him! If I stop, I’ll lose him again… Doogie stared up at his long lost friend, meeting eyes with him. Shun passively stared back, his eyes an empty well, not registering any emotions as Doogie yelled out for him. No matter how far he ran Shun always seemed to stay just ahead of him, ever out of reach.

Throwing himself forward, Doogie frantically grabbed at Shun. For a second his fingers seemed to brush against Shun’s shirt before he fell to the ground. As he looked up, Doogie saw that Shun had changed. He was horrified to see that Shun’s clothes and skin had turned as black as night and his eyes had suddenly turned yellow. As he continued to stare up in horror, he watched as Shun grew in size soon towering over him, reaching down, wrapping his giant hand around Doogie. ”Shun! No, please! Not you!” He screamed in pain as Shun squeezed his ribcage, trying to kill him.

Doogie bolted up awake, his heart pounding and his ribs aching from the dream. ”Shun…” Deep in thought, Doogie climbed out of bed, walking around his room, ”Why did I just dream about him? It’s been years…” He looked out his window, still trying to calm his racing heart, his eyes catching the shattered moon in the sky. ”Shun…If you’re out there, I hope you’re okay.”

Questions/Comments/Suggestions?
None!

[Jin]

Hello Doogie,

I'm sure you know how this works by now. First I'm going to hit some grammatical errors, then we'll move onto storytelling.

So, for the grammar:

"His eyes are a piercing eyes are a deep magenta color, deep as wells revealing the breadth of knowledge found within him."
I'm sure you see what's wrong here.

"He accompanies said fashionable clothes with tight dark wash blue jeans and black sneakers with a white rim around the bottom."
There should be a comma between "tight" and "dark-wash."

"As soon as they were discovered people started testing them to see what they could be used for and it wasn’t but a few months before scientists discovered their ability to be used together to form a ship capable of not only flight, but otherworldly flight!"
This sentence is a run-on. Try breaking it up into two. Also, you're missing a comma after the prepositional phrase at the beginning of the sentence.

"Then, at the age of 10, while he and his parents were travelling, they happened upon a merchant trying to sell them a “magic notebook”, even though they thought it was silly and there was no way it was magical, Doogie convinced them to buy it and upon inspection back in the ship, he discovered that it actually was magic because he was able to bring his drawings to life!"
This is another run-on sentence.

"Along their travels, Doogie and his parents made some friends along the way and he began practicing drawing them and he soon discovered that not only could he bring his drawings to life, but if they were his friends and he practiced his drawing really hard, he could bring them to life and they could talk to him and help him if he ever found himself in a pinch; but unfortunately there was nobody that could help him out when he was separated from his parents."
This is a run-on sentence.

"He had never flown the Gummi Ship his parents had, but at the age of 15, his parents decided that it was about time he began learning."
That second comma shouldn't be there.

"So they let him start to fly it around by himself and eventually gave him the go ahead to try flying out in space, and he joyfully did so!"
You've got another run-on sentence here, and there should be a comma after "so."

"It took Doogie by surprise and he lost control of the Gummi Ship and was knocked unconscious only to be awoken after the crash of his Gummi Ship into Traverse Town."
This is a run-on sentence, and there should be a comma before the first "and."

"From there he spent some time trying to repair his ship and discovered a friend that would change his life forever."
Missing comma after your prepositional phrase.

"Ricardus Dar’Nala, otherwise known as Shun, had been one of the first people Doogie talked to after finally finishing up the repairs on his Gummi Ship, and they quickly became friends, travelling around Traverse Town to try and discover the “Heart” of the world that Doogie had heard about, and were soon joined by a boy by the name of Tyson."
Another run-on sentence.

"They searched around town and found the Bell above the Gizmo Shop and hit it, but nothing happened as Sora had long since sealed the Keyhole."
Another run-on sentence.

"When they reached the surface they were shocked to see that their appearances had changed!"
There's a missing comma after your prepositional phrase.

"After they finally got over their new appearances, they began exploring the world, trying to find this so called “Heart” that they had searched for in Traverse Town, finding it near Oogie Boogie’s ruined manor."
That second comma shouldn't be there. This is another run-on sentence.

"Soon after they were attacked by a Possessor Heartless and after a long battle, they defeated it but unfortunately Shun suffered massive injuries, causing him to fall unconscious."
You're missing comma after your prepositional phrase. That first comma shouldn't be there. There should be a comma before "but." That last comma doesn't need to be there.

"Doogie took him back to the Gummi Ship and after nursing him back to consciousness and they shared a moment of tenderness where they revealed their feelings for one another, but unfortunately it was short lived."
There's a missing comma after "Gummi Ship." Your second use of "and" here makes the sentence read awkwardly.

"Doogie spent years searching for him but was never able to find him, eventually giving up, hoping that his friend had found safety and was able to heal and find whatever it was that he was looking for."
There should be a comma after "searching for him." Further, you'd be better off starting a new sentence with "eventually giving up."

"He met a couple friends along the way but didn’t ever stick around with them very long, scared that if he travelled along with them for too long that they’d up and disappear like Shun did."
You need a comma before "but," and the clause after the comma you currently have would be better off in it's own sentence.

This sums up the errors in your History, and I think you can get a pretty good idea of what you should be looking out for.

A few points on the narrative you've set up as well.

I'd like it if you could add some more detail to Doogie's time on Lunus. What sort of world was it before the Heartless were there? what sort of world was it after? Did the people attempt to fight back at all, or was it more a game of running for their survival? Had gummi blocks always been in the world, or did they find their way to it some other way? What sort of people were Doogie's parents? I feel like a lot of these points could be more fleshed out and expanded upon.

That being said, your two weeks begins now.

Good luck, and happy editing!

[Clio]

The lore-keeping moogle flits through the air, over to to the B section of her little library of lore. Her small hand hovers over several books until she lands on the one she's looking for, and with a little extra effort, jars the large thing from its place.  With a bit of effort she manages to plop the book onto her desk.  

A rustic red is the color of its cover, adorned with some faded maroon filigree.  She thumbs through several pages, honing in on the information she seeks.  "That's what I thought!" she mused to herself, an interested gaze flicking back up to you.  "You've been here before!"  

With a grin she slams the book closed.  "Well then there's no need for me to dig any further into your paperwork." Picking up her stamper, the little moogle makes her decision official.