Neon Rentlin

[titress]

[Name: Neon Rentlin


Nickname:
Black X
Masked Eliminator
The Crossing Assassin
Shine (only by those close to him)
Age: 17


Gender: Male


Species: Human


Position: Neutral


Powers: He isn’t very good with traditional spells, so most of the techniques he picked up from others or created himself.

X Marks the Spot: as Neon cannot always take out his targets immediately, sometimes he needs to come back to it later. So, whenever he touches a target somewhere on the body (even on the clothes) he can leave an X mark there. While the mark is there, He can use a small gemstone to point him in the direction of the mark, thus coming back to whoever he targeted. This technique also works on inanimate objects. If someone notices the mark, it can easily be removed with a Cure spell or by drawing something on top of it. He can only have one mark working at a time.

Cross Out: While using his spear, he uses it to cut in two directions in the air and forcing it forward, making sort of an X-shaped wave shoot forward. He uses the properties of his spear to make this possible.

X Spiral Wave: By spinning his spear really fast while wearing his mask, the markings on the mask begin to glow. It then releases a spinning, black X that spins towards the user at blinding speed. The faster the X, the more power it takes and the more it drains the user.

Fade Out: A fail-safe technique that is used when he is surrounded with no way out. With a tap on the center of his mask, Neon slowly fades away, making it so he disappears without a trace. He will reappear later at a spot he marked with a circle beforehand. This technique is only used in the direst circumstances since using it otherwise is a risk to his health. Using it when not in serious circumstances is extremely draining, since the ability takes all the energy it can without killing the user.
He has deemed this style of attacks X magick and is convinced he is the only one who can use this power.


Weapon: the Exo Spear
A spear that is white with Xs of many colors all dotted around it. It has a silver spearhead on both sides of the spear with sharp blades sticking down the shaft, so it can be spun around to cause damage. At the center, black ribbons are tied around the shaft with two Xs sticking out at both sides of the ribbons, making a makeshift hilt.


Neon tends to spin the weapon around as a weapon, since the sharp spearheads can cause twice the damage when cutting into enemies. It also makes it easier to throw at opponents. The spear always returns to Neon after a throw, so it isn’t like he is going to lose it. The two spearheads can also extend, making the spear even taller, but much more difficult to control. Neon doesn’t use this mode much since it is much too slow for his liking.


The sphere has a habit of making X formations when it pierces an opponent or cuts through the air. It also connects itself to individuals that can use it and teaches the user techniques it couldn’t learn on its own. Neon’s mask is also very connected to the spear since they have always been used together throughout history.

Appearance:
Neon is of average height for his age, measuring in at about six feet and 150 pounds. He is rather broad shouldered and has somewhat tanned skin. Silver bands go all the way down his left arm and a bracelet made of black and white Xs surrounds his right wrist.


The first things you will notice are his neon green hair, which comes down in several strands across his face. The second thing you will notice is the mask that he always wears upon his face. The mask is white in color with four double sided arrows coloured black that cross at the center of his face.
There are no eye holes or spaces for a mouth on the mask, but it was made from a material that allowed sound to pass through and was see through on one side. His spear is always tied to his back with a black ribbon. His outfit stands out a lot. He wears a white jacket that falls to his feet and it is trimmed with a golden colour. Underneath the jacket, he wears a tie-dyed t-shirt with a black X at the center.


At the bottom half of his body, he has white pants that match his jacket, gold trim and all, he also has several black straps keeping them close to his legs. He wears heavy grey cargo boots on his feet held together with golden X shaped buckles. A silver chain hangs out of his pants pocket.
Although you wouldn’t see them often, his eyes are bright neon green, like his hair.


He also has an X symbol on the back of his left hand.

Personality: Neon is a cocky guy who will do whatever someone asks of him, as long as there is a price. As far as he’s concerned, he has no conscience and is happy working for shady individuals, not to mention his love of fighting. For someone to be a friend of him, he believes their trust must be tested furiously and he must have something in common with them.


To him, every technique, skill and ability can be learned if you try hard enough. He will never ask anyone to teach him anything due to his beliefs and would rather take a blade to his face than go to a school.


The one thing that he loves to do is causing a riot. He’s been kicked out of every bar and club out there because of this. He enjoys heavy metal music and is obsessed with symbols. He especially loves the X one of the alphabet. His favourite food is a grilled sub with the works and his favourite colour is neon green.


He is a relatively skilled fighter who loves showing off, which is one of his weaknesses.


One thing he will never tell anyone is his fear of the ocean and what is found inside. He stays as far away from the water as possible and avoids those that can use water magick.
He is a very avid reader though, which is where he picks up basic techniques and theories on how to come up with others; although a novel is good every once in a while. He hates sushi and clingy peoples, stuck-up people with cash in their pockets and heartless. He still thinks the white things that separated him from his friend are different forms of heartless.


Original World: Rioksa (Fake Worlds FTW)
Current World: Radiant Garden


History:
Neon was born to a small family who shared his bright eyes. He was born in the world of Rioksa, a world where being a mercenary was a regular job choice. His parents died only a day after his birth in an accident with a fire caster that burned them to death.


He was given to a secluded orphanage, since there was no one else that cared enough to take him in. When he was five, he decided to name himself, since he only had a last name to cling to and chose Neon based on his eyes and hair.


At the orphanage, Neon became close friends with two other boys that always called him Shine since they joked that if anyone looked in pitch darkness, they would see his neon hair shining through.


At one point, he and his friends were taken to a beach as a gift from the man in charge of the orphanage, since they were the only ones that were never adopted by another family for unknown reasons. At the beach, while chasing his friends through the water, something dragged him into the water and kept them there for a long time. At least it seemed like that when he woke up a day later. He has avoided lakes and oceans like the plague ever since.


On his tenth birthday, Neon saw a small dark being scurrying around in front of the orphanage, it then went “flat” and hurried down a street. Being the curious kids they were, him and his friends went to investigate. Big mistake.


They followed it into the forest of the town, where the dark creatures surrounded the friends. They were determined not to die that day, since they still had lives to live. One of the friends pushed the other two out of the circle and told them to run, while the shadows devoured his heart.


The two that were left kept running away, since it was too late to rescue the other friend from his fate. They made it back to the orphanage, where they told everyone of their friend’s fate.


Once he turned eleven, a peculiar man who wore a red mask on his face found Neon and adopted him, claiming he had potential as an amazing mercenary and fighter. He was brought to the man’s tiny house and, despite Neon’s many objections, was taught the secrets of “X” magick, a skill all mercenaries could use in the world.


The man’s training tactics were somewhat unconventional, usually involving trapping Neon in a room with nothing else inside until he could use the ability successfully.


A year went by, and the only ability he had managed to master was X marks the Spot, which is an ability almost every Rioksan could use. But, refusing to give up on him, the man developed a new idea.


With the gear of the great mercenary, Black X as his model, the man created the Exo Spear and a special mask, both of which would help Neon focus his energy. Neon loved the objects tons since they were based off of his favourite symbol, just like the magick.
At the age of Sixteen, Neon still couldn’t use basic X techniques like “X” and “Xra”, but had learned more physical techniques, which was easy to use with the spear and mask. He also managed to sneak into his guardian’s office and discover the technique the original Black X had used, Fade Out.


The man was thrilled with Neon’s success and loved the way the boy could use the spear. He brought Neon to a party one night to celebrate. Unfortunately for them, Neon took it a little too far.

He took out the bar, along with half the town after someone secretly put strong alcohol in his drink, despite being too young.


The town got together and decided that they should banish him from the world before he could cause any more damage. That wasn’t the deciding factor since they didn’t know the full story.


The thing that sealed the deal was that Neon agreed he enjoyed it.


So, with the small amount of stuff he had and the Gummi Ship the town used to take him away, he was escorted out of the world to the nearby world of Radiant Garden.


Neon didn’t take this as a setback, merely a fresh start. He quickly established himself in the Radiant Garden’s underworld, with cheap prices and a guarantee on getting the job done. Needless to say, his business took off like a rocket.


Now, at age 17, Neon is definitely not the innocent kid he once was. He kills for a living, both human and non-human and is obsessed with finding X style attacks. He still misses his friends, especially the one that had saved his life, but he believes that his friend will show up when the time comes.


Role Playing Sample:
Neon quickly dashed on top of the buildings. The full moon shone on his back as he continued on. A sly smirk was on his face, hidden by the familiar mask. Slowly, he pulled a small, clear stone out of a small pocket on his jacket with a bright arrow pointing to the north. With one last smirk, he set off in the direction of the arrow, following his target of the night.


Jumping from building to building, he was quickly trying to finish his mission. The guy who hired him only offered 125 munny, but he loved his job too much to turn it down. He had a party to crash, so he didn’t want to take too long.


Several minutes later, Neon pulled the stone out of his pocket again and this time, instead of an arrow, an X was there, meaning he was literally on top of his target. He smiled again. It looked like he’d be finished faster than he thought.


The door of the building swung open and the tall man came out. He was glancing nervously over his shoulder as if someone was following him. Neon stayed perched on top of the building for several seconds, enough to see a white X highlighted on his shoulder. X marks the Spot still hadn’t failed him.


Neon jumped down into a nearby alley and dashed out, posing as someone in a rush, then quickly ran down the street and bumped into the man, picking his pocket in the process.


“Oh, sorry!” He called out, not turning his face to his target, since his mask was still on his face. The bait had been set. Neon went through the boring black wallet for a second, just to pull him in even further.


“What the- Hey! Get back here!” The target yelled towards him, starting to run. Neon smirked and then ran towards a darkened alley, slow enough for the man to follow him.
Once he reached the end of the alley, he felt someone’s eyes staring down his neck. Heavy panting filled the alley. He wasn’t a very fit man if this small run drained him so much.


“Y’know… It’s rude to stare.” Neon stated mockingly.


“Just…Give me back my wallet.” He mumbled between breaths. Neon’s mouth changed into a wicked grin.


“Of course you can have it back!” He said excitedly, throwing the wallet to the man while turning around at the same time.


The man stood there shocked, his eyes wide with fear.


“Y-y-y-you’re the-“


“Black X. Yeah… I get that a lot.” Neon said, pulling the spear off his back. The man took a step back, getting ready to run. Neon shook his head slowly.


“Now, now… If you run, this will have to be a lot dirtier than it could be.”


“I can out pay your employ-“


“Nonsense! If you do that, it’ll ruin my fun! Plus, I would hate to disappoint the other guy.” Neon quickly ran behind him and pushed him further into the alley.
His next move was spinning his spear around his body. It went faster and faster around him until there were was a black X spinning in front of him.


“No! Please! I don’t deserve this!” The man yelled, obviously terrified. Neon didn’t even blink. If this guy wasn’t finished, it would shatter his reputation. This guy was delaying the party he was going to as well.


“This has been fun, but one of us must be going…” He jabbed his spear forward. The X started spinning towards the man, slowly getting faster. He started backing up. Neon, who finally couldn't take it anymore let it go at a blinding speed and collide with the man's chest. When it was done, the man collided with the wall, a huge cut going right through his body with a look of terror still painted on his face.
he pulled his mask away for several seconds, his eyes gleaming in the moonlight. With one last smirk, Neon turned around and jumped on top of the building heading in the other direction. The arrow in the stone had disappeared, along with the life of that man.


Questions/Comments/Suggestions? I’m planning on making a second character for the friend, so I will explain the portal in his character sheet.

[Ellie who has 0%]

Hello Titress, and Welcome to Kingdom Hearts World Destiny.

Let's GET CRACKIN!

Powers;;

Ghost Image Spear;; It's quite random for your character to obtained an alignment of illusions ._. without explanation, especially if he uses 'techinques' in exchange for lacking spell and magick knowledge.

Double Cross;; It's quite random for a character that isn't skilled to an element to be able to produce light. Light isn't even an alignment to his weaponry.

Fade Out;; So the disappearing act deals with his mask. If his mask have such mystical properties, then you should mention it.

In short, yes we like to give charries nifty POWERS, but you should be able to articulate and explain the background of it. Without a line of continuity and explanation...it's random giving it a red flag of needed elaborations.

History;;
Is there truly a beach...welcoming orphans in Traverse Town, a world that's endless night? You have a better chance with Twlight Town.

Keyblade Hatred? I'm only calling this out, since you're using this as a plot device for your character development. In short it's weak.

1.) How convenient for your character to find a RANDOM picture of a keyblade, a dark keyblade,

2.) He finds a picture of a keyblade...quite random without ANY association with his friends random disappearance from a small world, Traverse Town, unless they were ripped apart by Heartless.

3.) Your character lacks the knowledge of what a keyblade is and what it represent to even have a legit source to hate on.

Radiant Garden Field Trip;;
I know you can form a better connection then him conveniently going on a gummi ship...that...happens to take him to Radiant Garden, where a mad man obsessed with "X" lived his second life...and he did this...right after his friend went missing.

Also with him being the approximately the same age as Sora the world would be Hallow Bastion with your characters time line...since he appeared their at the age of 10, which is roughly the same time where the Radiant Garden shifted into Hallow Bastion.

._. From then on since the age of 10, this boy survived..and randomly found a book of 'x' techniques (wtihout much explanation...what that is.)

Overall the history is unstable and weak for a character to build up on, and you didn't even took the Kingdom Hearts timeline into consideration of where your character fits in the worlds' timelines (since he lives in a canon world). To make this better, you need to refresh your history to be more sturdy and believable, which will produce a livable character.

5 days.

[titress]

I fixed my sheet.

[Ellie who has 0%]

For reading sake, please double space your paragraph. It's easier on the eyes for I can read your profiles throughouly.

[titress]

Ok, fixed it.

[Ellie who has 0%]

We had past profiles like this with the history of surviving a heartless infested Hallow Bastion, which is found highly unlikely.

If you need help connecting 'x' magic...and where he learned ...how about having him ending up in the world...where that technique was a norm and was taught it once in an orphanage of that world or adopted. Just a thought to help out, because what you have isn't helping your case.

IF you weren't away you can make up your own world for your character to live in, which tends to make things easier.

5 days.

[titress]

Thanks for all the advice, it's really helpful towards making a good character.

Also, I edited the sheet again.

[Ellie who has 0%]

Thaat's more commendable

accepted;;

Now that are officially apart of the WD family. Repost your profile in the FINAL PROFILE board in the ORIGINAL CHARACTER sub-board. Also you can go into the PLOT CENTRAL and make your character a CHARACTER RELATION and JOURNAL to keep up with Neon's adventures and threads. This isn't required, but it is good practice and resourceful, because it's now a requirement for all Canon Characters.

Also put a link to your character profile in your signature. You can access your signature by either clicking your username or scroll up and click the big "profile" button. There you will see a set of links, and click 'modify profile' at the bottom there should be a section called "Signature" where you can post the link.

use this code if you like:

[url=linkofyourprofile]Character's Name[/url]


or you can do like I did, give a link to your character journal, which inside have a link to your charrie's profile. The signature have a word limitation, so using journals is resourceful.

Now with all of that said, HAPPY RPING!