Atlas (retry)

[atlas]

Name: Atlas Zeromuse


Nickname:


Age: 31


Gender: Male


Species: Human


Position: Neutral


Powers/Abilities/Techniques/Skills:

Expert marksman: Atlas has an extremely high ability to handle guns.

Weapon/Items:


Viduus: Atlas' only weapon. A gun that only fires bullets with magical power. This Gun's Barrel can split into six barrels. It's power is said to be able to slay gods, but that power hasn't been tested in centuries.

~) Dragon Fang: Magically enhanced bullets that have the power of fire dwelling inside.

~) Mater Terra: Magically enhanced bullets that have the power of earth dwelling inside.

~) Sub-Zero Dark: Magically enhanced bullets that have the power of darkness dwelling inside

~) Heaven's Calling: Magically enhanced bullets that have the power of light dwelling inside

~) Ark Pierce: Magically enhanced bullets that have the power of lightning dwelling inside

~) Tundra Chill: Magically enhanced bullets that have the power of ice dwelling inside

~) Blowing Gates: Magically enhanced bullets that have the power of air dwelling inside.

~) Drowning Clouds: Magically enhanced bullets that have the power of water dwelling inside

- Fusion Shots -

Ark Pierce| Fusion | Dragon Fang *> Burning Souls: A combination of Ark Pierce and Dragon Fang, creating a powerful bullet that has the two elements within it's core.

Drowning Clouds | Fusion | Sub-Zero Dark *> Submerged Black: A combination of Drowning and Sub-Zero Dark, creating a powerful bullet that has the two elements within it's core.

Tundra Chill | Fusion | Blowing Gates *> Frosted Air: A combination of Chilling Tundra and Blowing Gates , creating a powerful bullet that has the two elements within it's core.

Heaven's Calling | Fusion | Mater Terra *> Mother Light: A combination of Heaven's Calling and Mater Terra, creating a powerful bullet that has the two elements within it's core.


Picture:


Appearance: Atlas has a slim but muscular build, with light skin and dark green pupils. His hair is long and tends to be chestnut brown in color, but often seems to change with the season. In fall and winter it is chestnut. In spring and summer, after slowly darkening in its color, it is dark red. He has a small goatee at the end of his oval-shaped face. A charming smile always seems to rest easy upon his lips. He likes to keep himself fit and optimistic.

Atlas wears a porcelain white mask on the right side of his face. Its demeanor is similar to that of ballrooms of the late nineteenth century, and he wears it to cover a secret that lies within his right eye. Draped across his neck and hanging off a long silver chain is a pendant; the bust of a horned demon, smiling and sticking its tongue out. It is made of old copper.

He's privy to long-sleeved buttoned shirts, typically white, teal, black or navy blue in color. Their wrists/cuffs are flared, like a pirate's. Beneath these, he wears a plain white muscle t-shirt. If he carries armor or anything of the sort he wears it over his shirt without shame or discomfort. He normally wears a black jacket over said shirts, lined with silver buttons and a sleek design.

He wears a silver ring on each hand, on both middle fingers, with the words 'non timebo mala' etched underneath each. An elephant hair bracelet is wrapped around his right wrist. He often covers his hands with smooth black gloves, made of a fabric like cashmere. His headband, he keeps tucked away secretly on his person. When he is in Kumogakure, however- acting as Raikage and fulfilling his duties- he keeps the hitai-ate hanging out of his left back pocket like a rag. The fabric it is made of is colored navy blue.

He wears a pair of black trousers, held up by an old leather belt with a golden buckle. He keeps his smaller items in the black butt bags that hang off the back of his waist.

He loves his pair of thick black boots, which cover three fourths of his forelegs and are held together with silver buckles. They are snug and built for all sorts of terrain. The soles are made with a thick hide-like material.

He likes to keep himself clean and fresh, and if one were to get close enough, they would notice the pleasant aroma of cologne lightly wafting around his person.



Personality:

A man who is known for his lightheartedness- always offering his help to anyone in need- Atlas is seldom referred to as hateful or sinister. Nevertheless, he has a knack for being misunderstood. He's an exceptional charmer, a happy-go-lucky fool who always seems to sport a smile, and just a plain optimist when it comes to solving problems and the like- though a bit rough around the edges when it comes to solving these problems with little to no collateral damage. He treads down his own path and heads toward his own goals, but lives for the people closest to him now, drawing his lust for life from their companionship.

Deep within him, however, lies a dormant personality. Memories of the horrors created during the war, lingering on in his mind, fuel this alter ego- a hollow, dark, lifeless husk of who he used to be. Confusion infused with sorrow surface sporadically as the weeks pass by, his amnesia effecting him on an almost constant basis. An amnesia he had woken up with after the Great Flash, an amnesia that had taken any relevant memories pertaining to his past life away. He was a soldier, he was a husband, he was a father- but something horrible had happened to them all. This mystery bolsters his disorder, his uncontrollable desire to figure out what had happened to a family he could hardly remember now. He needs to remember.

But there is a recompense, a temporary way out. The way of the sword, the art of combat... it spawns a new personality in the man, a different alter ego. Filling the emptiness that resides within, whenever confronted with typical combat, is what he likes to call the Electric Hot Barbeque. He is disciplined, but playful with his words. Observant yet relaxed. A valiant warrior who fights with mercy and compassion, but doesn't shun the fact that he also enjoys the thrill. He'll help the weak, execute his own form of justice, and do it in style with his flaming red hair. Taunting is just another form of combat, another tool to be used when facing a particularly ill-tempered opponent. He, on the other hand, is quite patient and level-headed. Focused, determined and courageous. But even he knows that shit will end when he faces off against those from his past, or any other person involved with the treachery and disappearance of his former wife. At that point, he'll resort to his True Self. Then all Hell will break loose.


Original World: Earth
Current World: Traverse Town


History:
~The start of life~
Atlas was born into a mafia family, his father was the boss, and his mother was the weapon tuner. he the mixing o the two had brought a high wealth to the family, so Atlas had excellent living conditions, so of the best compared to other students in his class. This living condition had given Atlas the ability to learn both trades, a gunman and a mechanic. The two together was the best union, the ability to fight and repair your weapon with ease, which had saved Atlas' life on many occasions.

When Atlas had turned five his mother had went looking for old ruins that might of led to the mafia family gaining more power. On the trip Atlas' mom had found such a thing, only it was meant for Atlas, she felt it in her bones. His mother had realized the small portion she discovered was just the power source for something, something much greater then most had dreamed about. After finishing the gun Atlas' mother had sealed it in a jar, waiting for the day Atlas had became pf age, the day his maturity had set in.

When Atlas had turned into a teen is when he began practicing to become ready to become a full-fledged hitman. The training took place when Atlas' father had the time, and when Atlas had gotten away from the rambling of school. Like his father Atlas had wanted to learn how to use guns in battle, but guns were very hard weapons to use because it took a lot of time before one could prepare it properly. So Atlas had asked his mother if she was able to fix the time it took by inventing a new weapon, s gun that was meant for him and him only, that's when he had received Viduus. And that's when Atlas left his family to become a soldier.

~Life as a hitman~

At seventeen is when most boys had turned into men, when they would pick ther first job and live by it for the rest of his life" His first year into the life as a soldier was mainly used for training and picking one's class in the soldier system, which Atlas had obtained the Marksman class, because of his earlier training in life with a gun, Viduus being the gun he was best with. Though the next year would be guard duty for scientist as they looked across the world for true power. That could be used for Research, and that could be used as a weapon against families that his family had hated.

Though the feeling of being one of the stupidest ones in the room, Atlas could help when the plane was becoming damaged, or for if the Engines had failed, he could help other mechanics with repairing it. Leaving a few of the other hitmen jealous. But there was one mechanic that was better then the rest, she would be Atlas' wife for in the future, but neither of them had know it at the time. Though they spent a year searching they could never find a power source, or anything close to one. After that year Atlas had requested to go on the same airship so he could assist with guarding, but he was needed elsewhere in the world, so Atlas and his future wife would not see each other for some time.

Though the two years went by slowly,, Atlas had turned twenty, letting him pick his own field of being a guard, or an assassin if a family battle broke out break had come up, or just a mere escort for some stuck-up rich people. Aboard an plane, which by chance he was able to board, Atlas had met Helena once again. But instead of being close friends they had become closer then that, even though the relationship was banned by law they still had loved each other, and still got married. So as Helena repaired the ship, Atlas had blasted targets with joy. On one such adventure, Atlas had found a very old ring, but it was powered with some sort of power that gave a protective shield over one when the put it on. That was the ring Atlas had used to propose to Helena with, which of course e accepted, and they got married, it was a small event with only eight people attending.

~Becoming an assassin/Being a assassin and a Father~

Around the time when most hitmen were tested for becoming full assassins, Helena became pregnant, which arose problems for when Atlas was training to become an assassin, because the day of the birth was the day of the testing. So he was torn about if he even wanted to become a Assassin, sure it was higher pay, but it meant he wouldn't see his son that often. But Atlas was reassured by Helena to become an assassin, in the end it would of worked out just fine. So Atlas had took the test, passed with flying colors, and had a son. It was one of the best days of his life, but soon it wouldn't of been so good after all.

Being an assassin was a hard line of work, while Atlas had never worked with the next stage up. He still did some dangerous assignments. One of which was contacting a new family that had been stirring up trouble for other families. But the conversation hadn't gone so well. The family had declared war or his family, while the people were less advance they still had a fighting spirit, so Atlas' family dispatched a few helicopters to wipe the family out. But the Zeromuse Family was too cocky in the end. Atlas had lead the troops against the family, but information on him was discovered, Atlas' wife and child were noted as MIA. Atlas had then became the shell, the husk of his former self.

Even though the whole tribe was destroyed, Atlas' family could never be found. No one knew what happened to them. But their was a few rumors of about how a child and a woman was seen roaming the site. With every rumor Atlas had became more of a shell. On what seemed to be a normal day Viduus had began to glow, which caused a spark inside of Atlas. A new personality was born, a caring and gentle personality. Then Atlas continued to serve as an assassin with full spirit. Though he had never became boss, it was a title for his cousin. Then the heartless came and sent Atlas to Traverse town.


Role Playing Sample:

Atlas' boots left tread marks as he walked through the old mansion, apparently there was a family here that was terrorizing other families within the allegiance . Of course it was an expert hitman who had to take care of the problem, people just couldn't take care of themselves. As Atlas kept walking his crimson hair bounced back and forth as it shone brightly in the sun, that was shining through the old roof. His black clothes made it hotter then it would of been if he had just worn white clothes, the mask didn't help either, but the mask was needed to keep him from turning back into thee hollow shell he was before. He ran a hand through his hair as he started walking up one of the ramps to the old mansion.

He grabbed Viduus and aimed at a group of hitmen that were playing cards, oblivious to his presence ."Mater Terra!" Brown bullets flew through the air and slide into the chambers of Viduus. with quick speed he shot down the hitmen and reloaded Viduus just in case if the boss was near by. Atlas then kept walking, a storm picked up, but it wasn't refreshing. A storm here would just cause the building to fall which was really unpleasant. And if Atlas was driven out of here because of the storm it would mean a mission failed. He could never return if that was the case. He smiled and pressed on, matter what this mission would be accomplished.

He stepped into an area were the wind was blowing really hard, that's when Atlas saw his target. A boos with a bird that charged as him. "Polly want a cracker, or how about a face full of bullets!" He smirked and shot the bird in the wings, killing. Than Atlas ran forward and jumped over to the boss, which was frozen with fear firing bullets into ihis head from above. He landed as the boss fell over dead. "Mission Accomplished!" He then left the old mansion, placing Viduus back into it's holster, that's when heartless surrounded him. The heartless attacked him as Atlas saw a corridor of darkness, he jumped over the heartless and fell into the pool, arriving at a town called Traverse Town.


Questions/Comments/Suggestions?

[Shun]

Weapons: I see some conflict between Viidus's description and the History section. It is stated that Viidus's true power hasn't been tested in centuries and yet... his mother invented it. Clear that up please... and also I'm quite iffy on having it able to "slay gods". Sure, it may just be a tall tale to increase his reputation but it still sends an overpower signal to me @.@. Having him able to use... what, eight types of bullets without any limits is also borderlining overpower, so I suggest removing the light and dark bullets (they would be the hardest to control) and add some limit, cooldowns, etc to the whole section. If you need an example, feel free to take a look at my Nadia Verdansky profile.

Personality: Does he have a second personality because of the events of his past or is it just a metaphor to show that he's not all happy and laidback? Just checking.

Original World: I'm going to have to ask you to change the name. We've had many Disney movies taking place on our world and yet in the Kingdom Hearts saga they all get their respective planets to avoid time/space conflict. Do the same with your character's homeland; you can keep some Earthy elements to make a smooth transition.

History: You mention a talent with mechanics; you might as well want to add that to your Abilities section. Question: At the end of the history section why did the weapon glow? Is there an existing link between the gun and its wielder outside of the ordinary "I use you to kill people" deal?

Roleplaying Sample: Most of this section is lovely. Just a tiny little detail at the end: I feel like the Heartless attack is a bit forced, and Atlas's reaction to it too. There wasn't any mention of Heartless sightings in the History section so I'd expect more of an "inner conflict" regarding them upon meeting such creatures XD perhaps fighting them for a while before deciding to escape. Just a thought.

Seven days to edit.

[Zephiris]

One day warning; tomorrow this profile will be rejected, editing time expired.

[Ellie who has 0%]

//Rejected for not editing it timely. No worries you can always repost your profile; I just advice to get your edits done to save time and get a bulk of the work out of the way. :3 Theen we won't sound like a broken record going over the same stuff.

~ Ellie